Being a Homemaker when there are no More Little Kids

I am coming home to be a homemaker even though there are no more little kids and it is kind of weird.  On the one hand it is exciting.  It has always been a struggle to feel that I could give myself 100% to a job and 100% to my home.  It always worked for a while and then began to fall apart like when the spinning plates on sticks begin to fall.  Then you put them all back and give it another go.  I am hearing more men say similar things these days.  That is a great sign that our society is looking at relationships and family!  Working from home or away from home it is about balance.

It gives me great pleasure to have a clean, warm, inviting home where my family and friends can walk in the door and feel safe and cared for. That makes this decision an exciting opportunity.  One where I can be available for our grown kids and grandchild in a way I have never been able to before (or at least for many, many years).  It is a chance to see how I can stretch and grow in other directions as well.   Who knows where it will go?

On the other hand it is surprising to me that I feel a little ashamed.  Like I should whisper what I am doing to people.  I am blogging, learning new skills, caring for my family, caring for my home, being available to volunteer, have the chance to speak a few places, building relationships, making yummy meals, spending time with kids as they transition into full adulthood….  I can’t even really begin to list all of the opportunities.  So what’s the deal?

The deal is I don’t make money doing those things , or most of them, and it feels like I’m not “doing my part”, though my husband is like this crazy smiling man all of the sudden.  You should see him.  He walks in the door and sees the clean house, the completed projects, smells the yummy food, hears about my day and grins from ear to ear.  I don’t care if anyone thinks that is old fashioned or even sexist.  The man is happy and that makes me very happy.

The second issue is the “what do you do?” question.  Meaning what career have I chosen and is it deemed to be a culturally acceptable and pleasing career?  Hmmm, well that is a good question.  One I am still trying to answer.  I’m happy, the kids are happy, my husband is happy, so far we can pay the bills, seems good to me.   That said, I know it is a door to new things.  I don’t think anything will be wasted in the decision and it can always change, but being a homemaker is nothing to be ashamed of.  It is the chance to invest in, care for, and build relationships and lives in a different way.  What a great opportunity!

I think the important thing to remember is that life is an adventure, one that keeps on going.  I don’t know what I will “do” in the future, I don’t know what life will look like day-to-day even, but I do know that there are some things that when we are given the chance to invest in them we should.  It could be a promotion, a new career,  learning a new skill, travel, or even coming home.  It could be so many different things and will continue to be new and different things as the years go by.  Just embrace them, see where they go.   So, here goes, I’m stepping into a new adventure!  I hope you do too!

 

What about you?  I’d love to hear about your adventures, thoughts, etc. Please feel free to post any comments.

Remember Wham O’ Window? Life is Kinda like that.

There was a toy from the 70’s called the Wham o Magic Window.  It was a sand like substance in between two pieces of glass and the designs changed as you turned it up, sideways, and back. (click the link to experience what happened when parents who were high in the 60’s made toys for their kids in the 70’s.) I have decided that the Wham O Magic Window is kinda what life is like.  You never know what picture it is going to make and you can always tilt it to try another look.

That is what our lives have felt like lately and now we are about to tilt it again.  I am making a shift from working outside the home to working from the home.  I am going to be a housewife, homemaker, homeworker etc.!  I’m very excited to be home more and to care for our family and our home differently. It is a new adventure!

My husband and I feel like this will open up opportunities for the future for me and for us and we are considering things like the possibility of going back to school, spending more time blogging, photography and so much more.   We don’t have a clue what this new adventure will look like, but we are ready for it.  There is something exciting about tilting the window, so to speak, to see what new picture will appear.  Change is good.

I think it is important to remember that life isn’t static, unchanging it is fluid.  I encourage you to try something new, discover something hidden about yourself and find the things that bring you joy.  Expect adventure and embrace it and if it doesn’t work out that’s OK learn from it and try something else.  Sometimes we just have to take a leap of faith, step our of our comfort zones, tilt the window and see what picture emerges even if you can only tilt it the tinyist little bit.  It is something and life is short.  I’m sure it will be beautiful.

Some of my new adventures: Spending time with the grandbaby, hanging with the big kids, finally having a clean house (maybe), www.bringingbackdinner.com, Flickr, telling people about Shaklee ,speaking opportunities, learning and growing, and just seeing what will happen next!  Now if I can just learn to tap dance! hmmm.

I look forward to hearing about your new adventures.  Tilt away!

Our Wedding Vows

ringsToday, January 7th, is our anniversary.  When we met each other we simply slipped into each other’s lives as if we had always been there.  We had found someone who could be trusted to visit the secret places of our hearts.  We had found best friends, soul mates, our upside down puzzle piece (by turning the puzzle piece over you can see the cut marks and tell if it is a perfect fit).

My husband is a gifted writer and when he suggested writing our own vows I panicked a little.  A friend said that it was funny to see him pull out a little book and me pull out an index card.  But, I think that our vows turned out perfectly wonderful, saying what our heart’s cries were and are.  They continue to be our heart for one another.

Our Wedding Vows:

Van:  God has named you his Daughter Full of Grace, and so you are to me.  Through you, I have experienced more of God’s grace than ever before in my life.  You are a safe haven, a place of peace, where I have found the freedom to be more my true self than I have ever been.  You speak truth to me in love better than anyone, always full of grace and encouragement.  You inspire me to be a better me than I have ever been, and you always remind me who I am in Jesus Christ.

I thank God for you, God’s Daughter Full of Grace, and by his grace, I will be the Son of God’s Heart to you.  I vow to be true to you, to be honest with you, and to speak truth to you in love.  I purpose in my heart to love you with his love, to pursue your heart more deeply every day, to reveal God’s heart toward you in all that I say or do, and to remind you always of who you are in Jesus Christ.

Being with you is like coming home and going on a great adventure at the same time.  I look forward to being at home with you, day in and day out, through joys and sorrows and even through the mundane.  I also look forward to the adventure of living life with you, of taking each step together as God gives us light, and trusting him with the future.  I look forward to laughing with you, crying with you, and praying with you.  Most of all, I look forward to just being with you.

I love you, Lisa, and in Jesus Christ, I give myself to you: all that I am, all that I have, and all that God has called me to be.  I am yours.

Lisa: There are secret places in our hearts where our imaginations thrive and our hopes and dreams are born. from the moment I met you, you walked into these places with me as if you had always been there, you belong.  You came into my world and your hopes and dreams made my hopes and dreams brighter and more wonderful, your imagination made mine more alive, you have loved the true me, the secret me, as a result I am more of who I am meant to be. I am more of who I am truly called to be.

  I cannot promise to love, laugh, share, hope, and dream perfectly.  I will never be the perfect wife, but I promise to love you for you, to hope to see you be more of yourself than even you knew existed.  To love all you are called to be and love you in the process.  I promise to hope for you, respect you, cherish you, imagine with you, to help you be the man God has called you to be, to be with you and to try again when I fail.
 My tender gift from God, simply put-With you and to you, I belong.
What a joy to share another’s life.